The Hand With Henna

 

Yesterday wasn't a great start of the week for me.
I got diarrhea and I went to the toilet idk for  how many times per hour
and I ended up looking like a zombie in class.

Then, my teacher realised that I was sick and decided to send me to clinic
straight away.

So to the clinic, I went.

At the clinic counter, there were two ladies asking me to register etc,
well the normal procedure when you go to the clinic.

Then I told them that I have my insurance, so I wouldn't have to pay.
So yeah, settled.

One of the ladies asked me,
"sakit apa?"

The shy side of me would definitely
wanted to be really polite and
wouldn't want to tell her straight away
that I went to the toilet because (you know why you went to the toilet,right?)

So I told her my minor reason why I went to the toilet; I vomited for several times.

And she looked very idk happy (?)

Then she asked me,
"Dah berumah tangga? Baru kahwin la ni eh?"

OHMYGOD
why on earth people would ask me that?!

I mean, I look very petite and I don't think I look that old to get married.

"Oh tak tak. Saya student lagi."

My weird face remained till I met the doctor,
till I got back to my room.

Then something just rang the bell.

I have the hands with henna, no wonder!
Who would have faced the morning sickness if not the newly wed right?
Or anyone who has got married

In my case, oh no.

That won't happen now.

Define love.

I may sound very lovey dovey lately,
but yeah whatever.
Someone asked me to define love,
because apparently thesaurus definition of love
isn't meaningful enough.
And my definition of love suits every category, I hope so.
Lol.

Love is
when you know you will be scolded for not eating,
yet you still do the same because you know
you are scolded because someone actually cares.

Love is
when you are angry and decide not to talk
to that person, but you can't hold the grudge
for a long time.

Love is
when you share everything with someone
and sometimes you have told them the same
thing for thousand times,
but they still listen to you.

Love is
when you try your best to fulfill someone's need,
no matter how hard it is to do so.

Love is
when you have exams/quizzes/assignments on the next day
but you still spend your time for that someone today.

Love is
when you know you will meet someone
new in the future, but you still decide to stay
because that person is irreplaceable.

Love is
when you smile every time someone mentions his/her name.
(Well this falls under different category of love, ykwim)

Love is
when you have strong telepathy with them.

Love is
when you have someone in your mind while reading
my definition of love.

x

Life, hopes, dreams and everthing that lies in between.

ofgoodandbadthings.blogspot.com

What I do for my best friend

I have so many friends, but those who can truly

understand me are not that many

and Amelia Rosley is definitely one of them.

Decided to make a small surprise birthday celebration

for this girl because throughout my 5 years in ssp

 this girl had always been the master mind for every surprise.

So, I shall do the same this time.

You deserve it.

:)

Love you always x

Happy go lucky?

Why am I so emotional?

Lately, I've been very moody and emotional and I hardly talk.

That's the first stage of depression, they said.

Oh well, I am depressed.

(look at the picture above, I tried so hard to smile)

And I realised talking to someone doesn't really reduce this effect.

What do I do? What do I do?

My moodiness makes me realise that 

some days, people will run away from me,

(not really run, but you know, keep their distance from me)

and I know that's coming.

That makes me even more moody than usual.

Oh yeah, I am scared.

That's the word,

the right emotion.

I am so scared of being left alone, it hurts.

It hurts so badly,

because I know it's coming.

What's coming?

Idk.

See, 

second stage of depression; not knowing what you want in life.

Oh okay, I am not that depressed till I need a psychiatrist,

my brain just scatters around.

My heart and brain don't tolerate well these days.

What do I do? What do I do?

 Some say, it happens when you've been missing someone,

so ew and aw.

Idk.

Maybe it's true too.

 

More and more Amigas are leaving

They are leaving Malaysia for good and will enjoy their three to four years in the USA.

Had been sending them off at the KLIA,

and it never stopped giving me the kind of goosebumps.

Of well, who doesn't want to study abroad?

And the chance has been given for me to prove my worth.

I haven't proven my worth though.

Ayah is right, goals without plans are only dreams and just dreams,

nothing more.

Hmm maybe I should be more realistic and less idealistic. 

Idk which one is better and I'm trying to apply tok concept here but it doesn't work.

God help me.

MM

Muzfira Mahadi :D

Of sleepless nights, sweats, tears and every story that we share

are truly the moments that I treasure most.

She's one of the reasons why I stay in KMB,

and after all,

I wish for a lifetime friendship with this incredible girl.

From KMB to Canada to where ever we belong.

May both of us be able to pursue the dreams of our lives and be the person we wish to be :)

 

Beyond The Horizon

30th of August 2014

That day marked another important event in my life.

Since day 1 I entered KMB, I've always been wanting to join a dance group and perform.

Thank you Suha for giving me the chance to.

Oh well, the dance team is definitely one of the best teams I've been working with.

Biggest thank you to them (Syira, Suha and Faralia) for the memories.

The three dances that we practiced within 2 weeks,

the ballet-ish dance was not that hard though, haha.

And let me share with you about my story, three days before the event.

A thing about me that is so negative is,

 can be very demanding.

Even I try so hard to make it look as if it's a good quality,

trust me it's annoying at times.

I cried damn hard, as if I was prohibited to eat tomyam for the rest of my life,

yes that bad.

I cried because ...

(This may sounded so crazy for the grown ups but little kids would definitely understand me)

No one that I love could come to watch me dancing.

It's a BIG deal for me, ok?!

And so I cried, and cried.

And I didn't have the heart to perform, at all.

But I tried overcoming that, and during the important day ...

*drumrolls*

He came without flowers and glass shoes but regardless, he came!

And that truly made my day :)

And a group of Amigas, one of my strongest support system also came, 

that was just remarkable.

Thanks for the memories.

x

Angel.

It happens like this.  One day, you meet someone and for some reasons, you feel more connected with this stranger, more than anyone else -- closer than to your closest family.

 Perhaps because this person carries an angel within him -- one sent to you for a higher purpose, to teach you an important lesson or to keep you safe every time.

What you must do is to trust that person -- even if he comes hand in hand with pain at times - the reason for his presence will become clearer in due time.

Though here is a word of warning - you may grow in love with this person but you shall remember that maybe he is not yours to keep.

His purpose isn't to save you, but to show you how to save yourself.  And once this is fulfilled, the halo lifts and the angel leaves the body as he exits your life.

He will be a stranger to you once more.

 & so I've met my angel. He teaches me lesson and keeps me safe every time.  I trust him even he comes hand in hand with pain sometimes.
& I grow in love with him & I always remember he is not mine to keep.

But can I ask for something different?
-- For him to stay and be my angel forever.

Soulmates?

"Souls do not have calendars or clocks, 

nor do they understand the notion of time and distance.

They only know it feels right to be with one another."

After You

If I wrote it in a book,
could I shelve it?

If I told of what you took,
would that help?

If I will it,
can I un-feel it,
now I've felt it?