Iryss turned 2!

 

Dear Iryss,

You turned exactly last month and we are so happy to celebrate

and thankful to have you in our life.

We have three celebrations for you and 

although you will not remember them much, 

we want to capture all those moments and

make you feel the happiest on your special day.

The first celebration was at your school,

and you also celebrated the day with your friend, Aaryan.

Your teachers told us that you and Aaryan are best buddies.

You guys always fight, yet you play most of the time together 

as he is only one day older than you.

We bought a Secret Indulgence cake from Secret Recipe,

as you love chocolate very much.

We also gave each person two packets of Koko crunch 

and a box of chocolate Dutch lady milk;

both are your favourites!

And we gave your teachers @bungawan cotton square hijabs.

We hope they love the tudungs!

(similar to the previous post)

The second celebration was on the 29th of July.

It was also a celebration for all July babies!

Nenda was born on the 12th of July, and Aisyah on the 16th of July 

and Wan Cu on the 21st of July, a day before you!

We celebrated it with my side of the family,

with all my cousins who were much younger than me.

We had food, durians, cakes and a kid pool.

We had bubbles and giant bubbles too!

You enjoyed the day very much, and so did Mama and Abah.

We decorated the garage, and it was all very last minute.

I gave all my cousins something for their late and early birthday gifts.

You received many presents from Atta, Tok Ma, Täti Sya, Mamang, Täti Na and Wan Cu.

I must remind myself to take pictures with Täti Sya, Mamang, Täti Na next time.

Last 19th August,

we celebrated your birthday with Abah's side of the family

and it was a celebration of three of Tok Pa and Genma's grandchildren.

It was Aaqil's birthday on that day,

Kakak Deenah's birthday is on 31st October and

yours was a belated celebration.

The theme was safari, and Ibu had planned everything for the celebration.

I helped out with choosing the decoration, Ibu and Ayah managed all the food,

MySu and Tok Pa cooked sup tulang for the day, 

Pak Lang, MyQa and MySu helped with the decoration too,

while Abah dealt with the contractor outside.

Genma made sure everything was in order and captured all behind-the-scenes moments.

Unfortunately, Alang wasn't feeling well that day, but

you kids only ate when Alang fed you all. 

Poor Alang had to share her food with you all :P

All Genma's siblings and families joined the celebration, and they're super generous 

in giving each of you nice gifts and money.

Thank you, NySu, Tok Su, Uncle Zhafran, Uncle Haziq, Aunty Pina, 

Tok Andak, Aunty Pia and Tok Yang

for the gifts and celebrating Deenah, Iryss and Aaqil.

Iryss,

Mama wants to highlight two profound moments that happened that day.

#1

When we were decorating, 

you were so excited as I assembled the balloons to make them into an arch.

When Pak Lang helped to hang the balloon arch on the wall,

you got more excited and impressed with the balloon arch.

The excitement made you say to me,

"Good job, Mama! Good job!"

with two thumbs up!

I was so happy at that moment,

you appreciated the efforts, and you were so happy with the results.

Thank you, Iryss, for appreciating the people around you.

#2

You had a nap for two hours before the cake-cutting session.

When we sang the happy birthday to you song three times,

because there were three of you,

you had a funny reaction of looking so heartless.

You didn't show any emotion for a while,

more like confused, or you had so many emotions at a time

that you didn't know how to express them.

Everyone had a good laugh at your reaction.

Everything was back to normal when you had your cake haha!

Iryss,

you'll grow up being a thoughtful, loving, caring,

kind, courageous, brave and wise lady.

You taught us so much about love,

patience, determination and strength.

We love you so much and will do everything for you.

May Allah bless you with everything good for you,

protect you from everything bad for you,

and May Allah suffice you.

Monkey See, Monkey Do

Happiest 2nd birthday to my firstborn, Iryss.

Iryss had a small celebration at school with a Secret Recipe cake (chocolate indulgence, always)

and we prepared two packs of Koko Crunch and a box of chocolate milk for all her schoolmates.

We also prepared a piece of @bungawan tudung for each of her teachers.

If you know me well enough, 

you know I love celebrations!

I love preparing for the door gifts, food and everything.

But I told myself not to overdo anything this year because

last year was a huge celebration.

Simplicity at its best,

and, most importantly, pocket-friendly.

Iryss has grown to be such a kind and clever girl.

She understands most of the words we say; she can say most basic words, like,

"Mine!"

"No!"

"Please...."

"Thank you!"

"Tasheh (Terima Kasih)"

"Together, sama-sama"

"Share"

"Sakit ke?"

"Nak makan"

"Eat"

"Mama buat apa tu?"

My favourite of all, 

"Aww thank you, mama!"

When she thanks you with an aww at the beginning,

it means she's really appreciative of your gestures.

And yes, I still breastfeed her at night.

She's a girl with a stance.

She knows what she wants,

she's always certain about her choice, and she always sticks to what she believes in.

For example, this one morning, when she saw her Abah was praying on my prayer mat

while she was half-awake, she said,

"Abah! Tu mama punya! Abah, stop. Abah, pray outside!"

Because I always pray in the room, my husband sometimes prays in the hall cause I usually have assignments to settle and I have to shut the door, or else Iryss would not let me focus.

When I tripped or accidentally injured myself,

Iryss would come to me with so much love and empathy,

"Mama sakit ke? Iryss hug. Iryss kiss. (Ke)siannn, Mama"

She's super caring. She's the best firstborn I could ever ask for.

I thank Allah every day, every night, for lending me Iryss in this world.

I make dua to Allah, so I can spend more time with her in this world, 

and may Allah reunite us again in heaven.

For everything she does, she reminds me that she's mirroring us.

The way we speak, the way we behave, everything.

She's mirroring us, the parents, every kid she meets at her school, her teachers, and her surroundings.

She's mirroring her environment.

We as parents, as much as we want to protect her from all the evil in this world,

we can only do our best.

This a gentle reminder for myself,

to protect, guide and always be there for my Iryss.

Iryss, if you ever encounter my blog when you know how to read and surf the net,

please know that I love you so so much!

You're not celebrating your wins enough

The third semester of my master's degree was no joke. 

The ride is getting tougher, not easier. 

I’m jealous of seeing all my friends who are pursuing their masters abroad 

because they’re having the time of their life.

UiTM is tough. 

I salute all UiTM graduates because the assessments require hard work and deep understanding. 

You have to be fully committed to ace. 

As a full-time working mother of 1, 

I struggled last semester, and I foresee things not gonna change. 

I will still struggle this final semester.

May Allah bless all my lecturers for their dedication, 

understanding and supports, and because so far, the classes are still online (which I appreciate most!), 

I could hear their babies crying in the background. 

They have their own struggles and yet still do their best. 

That gave me a hard slap. Why couldn’t I?

I took study leaves when I was drowning with assignments and tests, 

I didn’t mind spending my annual leaves on my study.  

I had to do what I had to do. 

The amount of time my daughter and my whole family fell sick throughout the semester.

When I had to defend my proposal, I had conjunctivitis. 

I was so stressed out. You had no idea how many times I forced Pan to listen to me rehearsing. Alhamdulillah, all praises to Allah, 

the defence went well, and they accepted my proposal with minor comments. 

Yes, it's not perfect; it still needs improvement, but I’m glad it went well. 

One of the examiners mentioned that I sounded like a news reporter. I hope in a good way, haha!

March 10, they announced our results online and for the first time in a long time, I got all As! 

All As! 4.0!!! I’ve never gotten a 4.0 before! 

My husband was the first to know, and I was so happy that day! 

And I know this was not because of my hard work 

but the prayers and sacrifices of so many people around me.

Especially my husband,

who has to listen to my rants,

my crying sessions, my rehearsals,

my ideas, my complaints,

who has to take care of Iryss on weekends during my classes,

at night after work, because I have assignments to complete.

I love him so much!

My parents and parents-in-law for the moral support,

for taking care of Iryss on weekends when we're exhausted,

for keep pushing me to the limit,

for encouraging me and, most importantly, for their endless prayers.

My Tok Mak, for being the most feminist woman I know,

for believing a mother could achieve anything her heart desires.

For always telling me to dream high, work hard, and pray harder to achieve those dreams.

To my siblings for making me push myself harder because 

I want them to know that they can achieve more than I do.

Family > anything!

Sounds like a graduation speech over there, but I realised I didn't celebrate my wins enough.

So, today, after the second week of my final semester,

I realise if I didn't celebrate my wins,

I didn't do justice to myself.

To dear self who had to stay up late and wake up early to study and finish up assignments,

who had to breastfeed a child while having another hand typing on keyboards,

who had to work late during peak season yet needed to squeeze time in between for research proposals,

who had to stay healthy even you got so sick because 

dear self, you're doing 4 major jobs -- a wife, a mother, s student and a worker.

Pat yourself at the back.

Tell yourself that you're proud of yourself.

You can achieve what your heart desires.

Believe in yourself even if you're belittled and doubted by your own little mind.

Congratulations, Aliah!

For getting a 4.0 in one of the toughest semesters of your Master's degree.

You deserve to celebrate your wins!

Big milestones!

 Today is my 4th day quarantined at home. Nope, not a Covid positive but the symptoms are worse. This is by far the worst fever I experienced in my entire life. My body ache, I was coughing like nobody’s business. I couldn’t sleep, I kept having weird dreams and my daughter, Iryss, who has turned 1 year and 1 month old btw, woke up every 1 hour for feeding. She’s still on breastfeeding and no, a mom couldn’t catch a break. My husband got the fever first, and I got it from him. As much as health is number 1, I feel bad for being absent for work.

Speaking of work, I have switched my career two times in a span of 3 years of working. Yesterday was my third work anniversary and I couldn’t believe I could make it this far because work life for the past 2021 was daunting. From 2019 - 2020, it was the beginning of my career, I switched from engineering to data field and honestly I found what I like. 2021 was when I was forced to be in a position I never expected myself to work in, Digital Marketing. Although the career path if you’re not working in a monopoly company would be bright, I myself found myself in the blackhole. I was clueless, and didn’t receive the kind of support I needed, so I had the worst days of my life. Mind you all of these happened when I was pregnant with Iryss and it just made everything worse. 

Allah has heard my prayer and saved me by giving me another chance to switch career and since April 2022, I am an analyst, doing finance stuff. Another field my old self would say you’re kidding me if she knew I’d be joining. But the support system is great, it’s completely new, I could be clueless but alhamdulillah I’m still enjoying it.

My daughter, Iryss has turned one and we had a few celebrations for her, at her school, in Melaka and in PD. Speaking of that, I haven’t posted any pictures from her celebration in PD yet because thank you to MySu and MyQa, we have so many pictures to choose from!

On the same day of my work anniversary, I received my semester two results. I forgot where I was at updating my life on my blog but yes, I’m a part time student at a local university doing Masters in Data Science and alhamdulillah for two semesters in a row I got the Faculty Post-Graduate Award for getting CGPA more than 3.75 every semester. 

To some it’s nothing to be proud of, but to me, I’m celebrating this huge milestone because I’m the one facing all the hustles studying as a part time student, full time worker, and on top of all that I’m also a mother. It’s a tough journey and I have two more semesters to go. I need to give myself a break, congratulate my dear self and be proud of this achievement.

Things will get harder from this point onwards but I want myself to remember that if I could survive these two semesters, I could definitely do better in the next two! These two semesters will determine my future as I plan to have another switch in career but probably a jump not a lateral movement.

The company has made it impossible to be promoted and my only hope is to wait for another 4 years before I can change company. As for now, I need to be good at finances and hopefully that knowledge will take me far one day.

Writing is therapeutic especially on days when I have so many things on my mind. I wasn’t as vocal about how I feel as much as I used to when I was younger. I rather keep my opinion to myself. It’s good and bad but I like protecting my inner peace. I will guard it well. 

Keeping my circle small, keeping my social media private and didn’t get too much information out there but yeah, I didn’t promote my blog elsewhere now and I hope people would have forgotten about it by now.

My breastfeeding journey

 

Dear future mommies,

Breastfeeding is a beautiful, yet challenging journey. Whether you plan on exclusively breastfeeding, exclusive pumping or bottle feeding your baby, it's totally up to you and remember that your choice won't make you less of a mother.

My breastfeeding journey started as early as my pregnancy. I determined to breastfeed my baby because of tremendous benefits of it. For the baby, and for the mommy. But those benefits won't come easy, although it's a natural thing and breastfeeding probably exists since Prophet Adam era, there is a lot for me to learn and it doesn't come naturally.

But till today, after almost 4 months of breastfeeding Iryss, I strongly believe that determination is the main key for breastfeeding.

Because of my determination, I started reading blogs on breastfeeding, watch videos on YouTube and I'm sure you can find them on the net and I started doing what I felt right for me.

To begin with, I started eating milk booster as soon as I was 6-month pregnant and particularly these two: 

You can buy this from this link: Nufiya Milk Booster

You can buy yours from this link: Milk booster cookies

 Nufiya drink worked as I started leaking towards the end of pregnancy, but I stopped consuming it because my sugar reading is kinda high. So, I just stick to the lactation cookies. They are not too sweet and delicious too!

When giving birth to Iryss, my hospital didn't teach me on how to breastfeed right away because I was going through c-section, so I couldn't even sit upright for 24h. Iryss was bottle-fed (formula milk). During my 2nd day only the nurse taught me how to breastfeed. It was such a short session, I wish they provide longer session for new moms.

In Melaka, we're lucky to get nurses come and visit us at home everyday till the 10th day, and alternate days till 20th day. So the nurses help me out with breastfeeding. They also shared tips and tricks on how to breastfeed and they gave me hope to continue doing so. Not gonna lie, your nipples are gonna hurt, lucky for me they didn't bleed. It's hard to get baby latching during the first few days. But you gotta push for it. 

I continue eating the lactation cookies and another thing that works for me was bertunku (hot compress) around breast area and at my back. That really helped in stimulating more milk in the beginning.

You can buy it from this link: Tanamera hot compress

Because my milk production wasn't a lot initially, I kept doing that before pumping. Yes, I was exclusively pumping in the beginning because Iryss didn't latch. But the nurses told me, to stimulate more milk, and to teach Iryss how to properly latch, I had to direct breastfeed her. 

Later, Iryss got jaundice. It's pretty high and the doctor at clinic advised on alternately giving formula milk, so we did. At that time, my milk production has improved and because I didn't own a proper breast pump, I experienced breast engorgement (bengkak susu). Oh my god, that time, I was crying so much because it hurt like hell. With my c-section wound, I couldn't walk or sleep properly, with learning how to deal with baby, with painful breasts, I broke down.

Luckily, I found a trick on how to reduce breast engorgement on tiktok and this blog and you can check it out here: https://milkbarbreastpumps.com.au/blogs/breastfeeding/clear-a-blocked-duct-with-your-haakaa-epsom-salts

It helped a lot!

Another trick I learned was to consume Sunflower Lecithin as it has been recommended to combat recurrent plugged ducts. I'm gonna you save some time and not to try searching for one at physical pharmacy because they didn't sell Sunflower Lecithin there. The only have soy lecithin. 

You can buy it from this link: NOW Sunflower Lecithin

After that incident, I learned my lesson. To always pump whenever I feel my breast is 'full'. And to always invest in good wireless pump.

I'm thankful to find this wireless pump, though it's not the most exclusive one, it works well and easy to be used. I buy mine from this link: Youha wireless pump

With determination, patience, perseverance and good support system, alhamdulillah Iryss is fully breastfed now. 

My doctor recommends me to continue taking pregnancy supplements when breastfeeding. I also consume supplements that help me with my milk production and give me all nutrients needed for me and Iryss. Here are the supplements I consume on daily basis:

Before breakfast:

I'd drink 1 glass of Wildan goat milk (chocolate flavor) that's mixed with 1 scope of Shaklee ESP, a plant-based soy protein drink for long-lasting energy.

Then, I'd take 1 tablet of Surbex Calcium-D3 and 3 tables of Shaklee Omega

I feel much more energized after taking these supplements and not gonna lie, Shaklee ESP is so sedap that I'm looking forward to drink it every morning.

After lunch

I'd take 1 tablet of Blackmores Pregnancy & Breastfeeding Formula, together with 4 tables of Shaklee Alfalfa Complex. 

After dinner

I'd take another 4 tablets of Alfalfa Complex and drink another glass of Wildan goat milk with 1 scope of Shaklee ESP.

Please consult your doctor before consuming any of these supplements. I'm just sharing my routine with you.

You can order yours from the following links: -

- Wildan goat milk (chocolate flavor)

- Surbex Calcium D3

- Shaklee ESP

- Shaklee OmegaGuard

- Blackmores Pregnancy & Breastfeeding Formula

- Shaklee Alfalfa Complex

I just registered as member for Shaklee because I'm using their products and I saved a lotttt! If you're interested to try Shaklee products and interested to becoming a member, you can DM me on instagram, @aliahnazamusa. Only sharing what's good for me and my pocket hahaha

Although I'm directly breastfeeding and I prefer doing so, I also bottle train Iryss during working hours. So I'd stock up my milk and store them in a milk storage plastic that I bought from this link: Momo House milk storage bags

my milk stock

This Shopee store sells cheap and high quality storage bag. If I were on the go, I'd bring my pump and a few pieces of milk storage bags in this cooler bag: https://shp.ee/8k69bd3. Super convenient!

As for baby bottles, I got lucky because I bought 1 complete set of Tommee Tippee Feeding Kit for half its price. It includes 1 x Steriliser, 1 x Bottle Warmer, 2 x Bottle Carriers, 4 x 260ml PP Bottle, 4 x 150ml PP Bottle, 1 x Bottle and Teat brush, 4 x Milk powder dispensers, 1 x 0-6m soother, 1 x Teat Tongs. So worth it! For only RM659. 

You're lucky, because Tommee Tippee official Shopee store has the same discount today: https://shp.ee/rutcbb3

Bottle train is important especially if you're returning to work. Do not start too early because your baby might be confused between your breast and the bottle, but do not start too late like Aliah here. Because Iryss would cry a river during every bottle train session lol.

I only bottle train her during working hours and at night, it'd be direct feeding, as it helps with milk production as well. 

To be able to breastfeed Iryss is definitely a great blessing. Every time after feeding, Iryss will smile and that automatically brightens my day. I hope I can breastfeed her till she's turning 2 years old. I hope every mother that's reading this will experience the joy and gift of breastfeeding.

Till my next post.

xo